Exp1. dream1

Madhan had passed the “Santa says hi” booth for the second time. There was no longer any chocolate. Madhan didn’t know where he had dropped it. There were bigger issues. Suddenly, the mall seemed really big. He felt, as if every turn he took, was a new one. There were people everywhere, bells everywhere and the SANTA SAYS HI booth too. He was afraid now. He wanted his mom more than anything in the world right then. He tried to remember where he had seen his parents last. In the supermarket. But he had been in there once already.Had walked straight through it, and still there was no sign of mom or dad. The music was no longer familiar.The lights were too bright. They were blinking way too fast and there were so many of them, on so many shops. Everything looked the same. He had searched every corner of the mall, but in vain. He shouted “mom!..... dad!” But no use. There was way too much noise. No one would hear him. Not a single familiar face in sight. His heart beat faster. The air was chillier now. It occurred to him that it could take ages before any help came. He remembered his father saying “ if you don’t stick together, you may get lost and we may go without you. So you better stay close.” He cried. He was lost.

what is happiness after all??

Life has been a whirlwind of late. 2 companies, 5 cities, 3 girls. “ Are you happy madhan?” That’s what she asks me. “Yes yaar..”I reply. I don’t know if I mean it. I mean, what is happiness after all? Statistics say Denmark is the happiest country in the world. “When would you ever be happy?” asks Mahesh. I try to give it some thought. What is happiness to me?

“I am always happy dude. It’s just that I don’t express it” I reply to Mahesh without looking at him. “Ghanta! Ur happy. Ur never happy man. Ur always this blob of complaints, who just wants more of almost everything in the world.” Yells Mahesh, right into my ears, least bothered that it’s nearly 11 pm and the streets are empty. “Hell, what’s wrong in asking more. I just don’t want to be satisfied at any point of time. That’s when the zing would be out of my life. There would be nothing interesting to live for if all of us got whatever we wanted.” I said again not looking at him. Mahesh stops and stands before me. “You are crazy man, and I’m not gonna argue with you right now. But you know what, try jotting down 10 things that make you really happy. That ought to teach you something.”

I return to the room, and am sitting with the laptop open, thinking of 10 things that make me happy. Nothing. I try to think analytically, let see.. 1) Job really can’t say anything about that right now. 2) Love life, yea rite! Considering the fact that I’ve only advised others on it, and most of them broke up soon thereafter. Wait, there is a girl. Two actually. One thinks I’m interesting. The other, I’m hoping, knows that I exist. 3) Family, yea that’s a sure shot. 4).... hit a blank just then. 'That sucks' I thought to myself. I can’t even list down 10 things that make me happy. “Dude, are you happy?” a voice inside me asks. I look around the apartment. There are people laughing, drinking, and being merry. Are they happy I ask the voice? “Well, they do look happier than you.” I step into the balcony. The sky is cloudy. It will rain tonight. How come I am not happy? Maybe I am. But how do I know, I ask myself. If only TOI had also given some kind of method to calculate happiness too. I try to look for signs. One of my friends once said that mostly unhappy people blog. “It’s because they don’t have anyone to open up to. The question still bothers me. What is happiness after all?

What is happiness after all?!?!